Core Skills for a Meaningful Conversation
This issue of Conversations that Matter discusses core skills for a meaningful conversation. Please send your questions, comments, or requests for new topics to Katie Hippen at khippen@umd.edu.
***The first three people to send feedback on this issue will receive an Amazon e-Giftcard in appreciation for your contribution.***
A student’s GPA is dangerously close to getting them kicked out. They tell you that they have been overwhelmed by classes, family, and job responsibilities. One of the only highlights this semester has been going out to the bar with their roommates every week.
Given the limited amount of time you have to spend with this student, what conversation strategies or tactics can you use to help them think about positive changes they can make?
| Core Skills | What to Say |
| OPEN-ENDED QUESTIONS keep the conversation from becoming one-sided. Open-ended questions get more information, invite the student’s perspective, or encourage self-reflection. |
“What makes going out to the bar with your roommates a highlight?” “What are some not-so-good things about going out with your roommates every week?” |
| AFFIRMATIONS are complimentary statements in response to the student. Conveying confidence in the student provides positive reinforcement and validation. |
“You’re capable of taking on a lot of responsibilities.” |
| REFLECTIVE LISTENING is an active process of hearing and understanding the student by paying attention to both their spoken words and body language, and repeating or rephrasing what the student said while reflecting back any meaning you perceived. This process demonstrates your acceptance of the student, and can also help clarify any potential miscommunications. |
“You’ve got a lot on your plate and seem overwhelmed.” “On the one hand you feel you need the relief of going out with your roommates, and at the same time you’re having some real concerns about school, family life, and your job.” |
| SUMMARIZING what you’ve talked about can encourage the student to think about next steps. If you offer advice, such as brainstorming ideas, make sure to ask their permission to do so or frame it as a suggestion. |
“Based on what we’ve talked about, it sounds like you want to come up with some ways you can pull your grades up, but also be a good employee, friend, and family member. We could try brainstorming some ideas if you would like.” |
*Adapted from Miller et al.’s (2003) Manual for the Motivational Interviewing Skill Code (MISC), available online.
References:
Apodaca, T. A., Jackson, K. M., Borsari, B., Magill, M., Longabaugh, R., Mastroleo, N. R., & Barnett, N. P. (2016). Which individual therapist behaviors elicit client change talk and sustain talk in motivational interviewing? Journal of Substance Abuse Treatment, 61, 60-65. doi:10.1016/j.jsat.2015.09.001
Miller, W. R., Moyers, T. B., Ernst, D., & Amrhein, P. (2003). Manual for the Motivational Interviewing Skill Code (MISC) version 2.0. Albuquerque, NM: Center on Alcoholism, Substance Abuse, and Addictions, University of New Mexico. Available at: http://casaa.unm.edu/download/misc2.pdf
Miller, W. R., & Rollnick, S. (2013). Motivational interviewing: Helping people change (3rd ed.). New York, NY: Guilford Press.
Core Skills for a Meaningful Conversation
This issue of Conversations that Matter discusses core skills for a meaningful conversation. Please send your questions, comments, or requests for new topics to Katie Hippen at khippen@umd.edu.
***The first three people to send feedback on this issue will receive an Amazon e-Giftcard in appreciation for your contribution.***
A student’s GPA is dangerously close to getting them kicked out. They tell you that they have been overwhelmed by classes, family, and job responsibilities. One of the only highlights this semester has been going out to the bar with their roommates every week.
Given the limited amount of time you have to spend with this student, what conversation strategies or tactics can you use to help them think about positive changes they can make?
| Core Skills | What to Say |
| OPEN-ENDED QUESTIONS keep the conversation from becoming one-sided. Open-ended questions get more information, invite the student’s perspective, or encourage self-reflection. |
“What makes going out to the bar with your roommates a highlight?” “What are some not-so-good things about going out with your roommates every week?” |
| AFFIRMATIONS are complimentary statements in response to the student. Conveying confidence in the student provides positive reinforcement and validation. |
“You’re capable of taking on a lot of responsibilities.” |
| REFLECTIVE LISTENING is an active process of hearing and understanding the student by paying attention to both their spoken words and body language, and repeating or rephrasing what the student said while reflecting back any meaning you perceived. This process demonstrates your acceptance of the student, and can also help clarify any potential miscommunications. |
“You’ve got a lot on your plate and seem overwhelmed.” “On the one hand you feel you need the relief of going out with your roommates, and at the same time you’re having some real concerns about school, family life, and your job.” |
| SUMMARIZING what you’ve talked about can encourage the student to think about next steps. If you offer advice, such as brainstorming ideas, make sure to ask their permission to do so or frame it as a suggestion. |
“Based on what we’ve talked about, it sounds like you want to come up with some ways you can pull your grades up, but also be a good employee, friend, and family member. We could try brainstorming some ideas if you would like.” |
*Adapted from Miller et al.’s (2003) Manual for the Motivational Interviewing Skill Code (MISC), available online.
References:
Apodaca, T. A., Jackson, K. M., Borsari, B., Magill, M., Longabaugh, R., Mastroleo, N. R., & Barnett, N. P. (2016). Which individual therapist behaviors elicit client change talk and sustain talk in motivational interviewing? Journal of Substance Abuse Treatment, 61, 60-65. doi:10.1016/j.jsat.2015.09.001
Miller, W. R., Moyers, T. B., Ernst, D., & Amrhein, P. (2003). Manual for the Motivational Interviewing Skill Code (MISC) version 2.0. Albuquerque, NM: Center on Alcoholism, Substance Abuse, and Addictions, University of New Mexico. Available at: http://casaa.unm.edu/download/misc2.pdf
Miller, W. R., & Rollnick, S. (2013). Motivational interviewing: Helping people change (3rd ed.). New York, NY: Guilford Press.